SMOKE SKY
After Dennis Cooper
The sky is so tight I want to puncture it with my eyes.
All the boys I wanted
turned up in my mother’s funeral
in masks and niqab and no this did not
make them hot
nor did they make me cum
Every woman I’ve ever loved plunged
her pens deep inside my smoked out lungs
And sucked my blood
raw and no
it was not hot
I have war fatigue but my frustrations make me strong
I scoot around this ghost town too pissed off to be suicidal
Been there and done that, selfish and selfless, I smirk and the sky is sable-black
like my mind
I bathe in my dirt and urine and count the stars I have
Fucked. I am filled with filth and this knowledge
makes me a nervous saint.
Dr Golnoosh Nour is the author of Sorrows of the Sun (2017) and The Ministry of Guidance (2020).
A nervous saint is the best of saints.
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